We had nicknames for everyone back in the college days. Of couse, this was college, so it was common for people to have nicknames. These nicknames were usually either a shortened or otherwise goof on their unpronouncable ethinc name, or perhaps a take on something they did once where the name just “fit”. We had some decent ones, usually derived after a few pints of beer.
Of course, we had some doozys; Apatz, Zer, B-Dog, Dank, Crackhouse, and so on. There was one guy in particular that had a bunch of nicknames that started off simple and honest, and eventually turned into something very different. His name was Dan Schultz. In the beginning, we called him “Schlutz”, because that was indeed his last name. After a while and some beer, it became “Schlitz”. After that, and undoubtedly more beer, “Schlitz” became “Schlootzy” or some variant of that. One day, arguably after more pints then a human should consume, me and my friend Zuti decided that his new name was “Shit Face”. Not because we didn’t like Dan, not at all. We loved the kid, but we laughed our asses off because the names had gotten progressively worse and less and less like his real name, that “Shit Face” was the absolute antithesis of “Schlutz”, and that’s why it was funny.
At my day job, I try and have fun because if you can’t laugh, then all is lost. There’s a certain degree of fun you need to have at work; it can’t be all work. So, a bunch of us collectively have names for some coworkers. Not everyone, but some who are friends and some people who are not friends but whos nicknames scream right out at you. 🙂 And they are…
The Riddler
The Riddler’s Assistant
The Pumpologist
Little Riddler
Future
Mr. Magoo
The Nutty Professor
The Dragon
Snowflake
Pig Face
Gumby
Montell
Father & Son
The best part about all these names is when I offer to order and pickup lunch for everyone. I get to fax the order to the restuarant, and I put nicknames instead of their real name next to each entree, so the people at the restaurant get a good kick out of writing “The Riddler” on a container of chicken parmesian. 🙂